NEVER SAW BLUE

There are moments in life when you really miss someone so much that you want to pick them up from your dreams and hug them for real. It’s difficult, most especially during these times.

This past few days have been my trying times. I was riding the jeepney earlier and I got so scared because suddenly I couldn’t breathe. I was gasping for air. I even attempted to get inside Cebu Doctors because I was worried that I might collapse in the street. Perhaps it was just the heat. Or, my heavy bag. Or, my tight belt. Or, the different thoughts in my head bouncing back and forth. But deep inside, I know I was not okay.

There. I said it. I am not okay.

I may look okay but, I am not.

This is just a front that I need to wear and when all of this is over, I wish to see the point.

I want to be over this. I want to jump in the bandwagon and just be whole again. Matud pa, I never saw blue like this before.